Health & Wellness

Published on November 27th, 2010 | by thevyne


How to Gain Weight Over the Holidays

Photo Courtesy of NY Daily News

By Siddiqu “The Personal Trainer”

All year I promote health and fitness, yet people still refuse to get serious about living a healthy lifestyle. So for those of you who insist on doing the exact opposite of what us trainers and health professionals say, this article is just for YOU. Here are six sure fire ways to gain excessive weight over the holidays.

Over indulge in alcohol
Drink and be Merry! Consuming alcohol is a great way to ingest large quantities of sugar and calories with little or no effort. Plus, there are the added benefits of the next morning hang over. And don’t forget the greasy breakfast that is required after a night of drinking.

Sugar has seven calories per gram, which is twice the amount of protein and carbohydrates. This can sky rocket your caloric intake and you won’t even realize it. For some serious poundage, add fruit juice or a carbonated beverage to your cocktail.

Don’t eat the day of a holiday party
You want to look slim in your party outfit right? Here’s how, make yourself ravenous by avoiding food all day until it’s time for the party. Start the party off with some cocktails and appetizers, especially the fried appetizers. Make sure you completely negate the health properties of the raw vegetables by coating them in lots of creamy dip. Now socialize by the dessert table, making it very convenient to reach for that extra cookie, brownie or chocolate.

Skip meals
Ideally, you want to make the most of your holiday meal, so go ahead and skip breakfast and lunch. This way you can consume your daily caloric intake in one sitting. And remember, since you’re so hungry you’ll be sure to eat extra fast, which will allow you to consume more food before you feel full.

Don’t make time for fitness
You’ve worked out all year long. Forget working out during the holidays. There’s no time, right? With parties and shopping and parties and shopping (I meant to write that twice) who has time for working out? We can pick up working out again at the first of the year. Hey, that’s a great New Year’s resolution!

For an added bonus, stay seated as much as possible during the holidays. If you stay sedentary long enough, not only will you gain weight but also that lower back pain you once had, yeah it will come back too!

Definitely Ignore the “Rule of 3”
Starchy carb, Fibrous carb, Lean protein blah, blah, blah. Forget all about the proper way to eat. It’s November and December now. Go back to the way you ate before you were introduced to the “Rule of Three” and watch the pounds add up faster.

Don’t drink water
Drink plenty of sodas, beer and wine instead. And when you’re headed for your morning java, remember to order the largest flavored coffee you can find, with extra whipped cream! Pumpkin Spice lattes at Starbucks work great!

There you have it. The true, straight-forward, no nonsense plan for guaranteed weight gain over the holidays. If you’ve already been following this plan (and you know who you are), then you know first hand.

Obviously, this is everything you should NOT do if you truly want to get healthy and fit. The choice is yours people.

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