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Published on September 17th, 2009 | by thevyne


All the Single Ladies: Dating Lessons Learned

DatingBy Keesha Boyd

It seems like every time I’m on the phone or out to eat with my single girlfriends the conversation almost inevitably turns into a discussion about the plight of dating. Not that we don’t also discuss politics, work, pop culture, etc. But at some point we find ourselves swapping those good ol’ entertaining “single stories.” I’ve heard stories ranging from men with weird dining habits that surfaced during the date and men announcing their fascination with dating women of color, to men whose idea of a date is laying up on your couch with his feet kicked up on your coffee table. Then there’s the ever popular man who just flat out lies about his status, job, interest in you, or that girl who keeps blowing up his cell phone, etc. Regardless of the experience, single ladies the world over continue to brave the dating scene in hopes of finding “Mr. Right…for me.” Whether the scene is the internet, a speed dating session, or an organized singles meet up, women continue to explore all possibilities. Although I’ve yet to venture into “internet” dating, several of my friends have and much to my surprise they have experienced positive outcomes. But by and large , they are still kissing the same amount of “internet” frogs as the next girl, despite the tedious up front profile process.

All of these fascinating, heart-breaking, funny and appalling stories (including my own) that get swapped over wine and appetizers, could probably yield some great advice for another single lady. So here goes Vyne readers! Let’s start a “dating lessons learned” list for all single women to benefit from. Sure you have your self-help books out there, but how about sharing some REAL advice, from REAL women, based on REAL experiences from our dating lives?  Post your advice and lessons learned in the comments section below. Let’s hear it ladies!

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3 Responses to All the Single Ladies: Dating Lessons Learned

  1. Donna J. says:

    A good guy friend of mine once told me if the guy you’re dating doesn’t assume that you’re spending Friday and Saturday night together, then chances are he’s dating other women….not sure if that’s true but I would say ladies should question the guy if you have to force your way into his weekend plans…

  2. Alisha T. says:

    I think we as black women need to be more open to meeting men in non-traditional places like at art galleries, fund raising events, ski resorts, etc.

  3. Lynnise Pimentel says:

    When on a date, let a man be “the man” & lead. A lot of times, we “alpha females” or “passive” placebos try to compress everything we are in one date. Leave a man guessing. Your life was not lived in one day, therefore don’t rush to tell your story in one date. So many times, we challenge ourselves to be the best date we can be, instead of just basking in the moment & enjoying ourselves. There’s no rush for “single ladies to put a ring on it” so “take your time & do it right”. Good Luck Ladies!

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